Reports
[091]

Error, missing comma; missing connective 'and'
Change: 'Oh mother, you're too much. You always smother me with compassion, and I will never forget that. Though, I'm sure I'll be fine. 

[093] change 'residence' to 'residents'

[094] Change 'many' to 'much'

[095] No epitaph?

[096] This would be a good spot for 'A secret to everybody' reference.
	
[097] CHange 'I can;t do much for this war' to 'I can't do much about this war'

[099] Change 'opened' to 'open' . Suggest change 'half-empty potion' to 'half-potion'.

[101] Can;t go down from here, it seems. Suggest adding fence. 

[118] Link does not like walking down beteen these blocks (torches) while on the ice. 
	
[121] change 'meet our member's location' to 'discover the location of our missing crewman', remove 'accomplishment'.

[122] This reads terribly. I suggest: 'This place land holds so many secrets... I really want to explore instead of searching for a deserter.'

[123] Change 'member' to 'crewman'

[124] What does this mean? 'Carry a big push'... 'thus useless'? Suggest replacing the second line, with 'We'll sell you something that you can use, to make up for our lost time. '
	
[125] Change 'Docking bay' (whhat is it, a SATA drive) to 'Coastal Docks'

[126] Change 'You must first carry the treasure that accomplishes the task' to 'Many require treasures that you may not possess.'

[128] Replace 'marks' with 'indicates', and remove 'indicates' from the next statement.

[129] replace 'lies' with 'holds', or change to 'A secret lies with the sinking barrel.'

[133] The horizontal jump here is a huge pain, because of that one block that juts downward on the left platform, catching Link's shadow.

[134] Do we really need three wizrobes in here? THe shooters, combined with jumps, and the block puzzle should be enough. Even one wizrobe may be too much.

Likewise, the room with the ice block puzzle, shooters, and wizrobes is insane.